Micah, Netherlands (he/him)

“I absolutely do feel I found a piece of a puzzle I never knew was missing, and finding it has made me so incredibly happy.”

Was there a definitive moment you realized you were trans? How old were you?

I had just turned 59 (which was at the beginning of 2025). I was reading a story about two men in love who were having sex, and it was quite explicit. I was turned on, but I also suddenly realized I was incredibly jealous that they had penises to do all those things with each other. And it struck me like lightning: I am trans. I am actually a man.

How soon after did you start to make changes? What were these changes?

There's an advantage to being so much older finding this out. I am pretty comfortable with changes in myself and my life. Two days after my lightning shock I changed my female name into a male variety and started calling myself that in my head, to see how that felt. And that felt good. A week later I started coming out, to my sister, my sons, my mom, friends. Two weeks after that I had a new male name (not the male variety of my female name). A month later I bought male clothes, got myself a new haircut and got put on the waiting list for a gender clinic.

Have these changes started to make you feel more comfortable in your life and body?

I never really had dysphoria. Maybe because my life has been filled to the brim with drama, that I never had the time to think about this aspect. But finding out I was a man and starting my social transition made me absolutely euphoric, I walked on clouds for two months, almost deliriously so. I feel more at home in my body, tho I have yet to start any medical transition. Even tho I never felt uncomfortable as a woman, never had bad feelings about my female body, female body parts, I had two kids even, the difference with how comfortable I am now is really big. I still can't say that I had dysphoria, but I absolutely do feel I found a piece of a puzzle I never knew was missing, and finding it has made me so incredibly happy.

What would you tell your younger self? Would you do anything differently?

No, can't undo the drama in my life. I have long felt that I would have preferred never to have had all that drama, but I am starting to feel that I am increasingly happy with the person that I am now.

Is there anything else you'd like to share?

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Have the gender-affirming steps you’ve taken impacted your overall happiness and sense of well-being?

Yes.